I was thinking yesterday...I used to have this great blog...what happened? Well, life happened. Kids and responsibilities happened. I'm sure many of you have been there. You know, a lightbulb turns on in your head and you embark on this fantastic idea, only to be overwhelmed by "real life." Everything that is not essential to everyday survival falls to the wayside. Well, that's me in a nutshell. But enough about me. On to today's post, which I have been wanting to write for quite awhile.
If I had to title this, I guess I would go with "A sense of belonging." Everyone wants to belong to something. In college, I was always amazed at all the lengths (and money) classmates would go to, just to be a part of a sorority or fraternity. I'm not knocking their decision, because although I never joined a sorority, I completely understood the human need to have a sense of belonging to someone or something. That is the feeling I have struggled with for quite a few years now. Backing up to my childhood, I lived in the same place around the same people for most of my life. We were a close-knit village kinda place. I loved it. Of course I realize that for some people, this would be an absolute nightmare; the past mistake that you can't run from, little sense of mystery or adventure, everyone poking their nose in your business. Well, I loved it, but once I went to college and got married, I saw a big world out there and I was itching to see it. This is what brought us to the Atlanta area. With a giant mess of college loans to pay back and a small Uhaul truck, we came to Atlanta with the hopes of a new sense of belonging.
Flash forward to today. We have been living in Dunmovin for 9 years. In that time, we have seen some changes of neighbors and landscapes. I have watched our babies turn into toddlers and into "big kids." We have become very active in our church and helped out with many school activities. We have hung out with neighbors at the bus stop and in the street, just chatting about the comings and goings. We have slowly developed that sense of belonging that we dreamed about when we came to the ATL metro 12 years ago. I have to say, it was not easy getting here. I had to eat a whole humble pie before achieving my own Mayberry. I have compiled a helpful list below if you are struggling with the same issues of belonging. Please don't be offended. These are items that I personally dealt with and told myself on a regular basis.
1. Get over yourself. Really, you are creating a lot of drama that just isn't there.
2. Stop waiting for someone to initiate contact. Most neighbors value your privacy and assume that you want to get settled in for awhile. If you want to get to know someone right away, invite a neighbor over to your place.
3. There are a lot of religious organizations around here and some are fanatic about selling you Jesus. It's okay to not answer your door. (I always felt guilty...)
4. Hang out in your front yard. There are tons of walkers and runners in our neighborhood. If you are constantly inside or in your privacy-fenced backyard, how on earth can you meet these wonderful people? Heck, just throw on some running shoes and walk around the block with them.
5. Be assertive in getting to know people. Have a party or invite the bus-stop moms over for drinks. This is the South, and there are still some of those bring-over-an-apple-pie-the-day-you-move-in kind of people. But the reality is, a lot of us work full time jobs and deal with kids, commutes, home renovations, elderly parents, school activities, etc. We care about new members of our community, but may not be able to plan a get-together that week/month due to current responsibilities.
Like I said, these are all things that I pulled together from my own experience. And I will eagerly attest, that there are some awesome residents in Dunmovin who have played a part in helping me find that sense of belonging. Please share your experiences!
-Dunmovin neighbor
Tuesday, May 7, 2013
Back from the Dead...
I was thinking yesterday...I used to have this great blog...what happened? Well, life happened. Kids and responsibilities happened. I'm sure many of you have been there. You know, a lightbulb turns on in your head and you embark on this fantastic idea, only to be overwhelmed by "real life." Everything that is not essential to everyday survival falls to the wayside. Well, that's me in a nutshell. But enough about me. On to today's post, which I have been wanting to write for quite awhile.
If I had to title this, I guess I would go with "A sense of belonging." Everyone wants to belong to something. In college, I was always amazed at all the lengths (and money) classmates would go to, just to be a part of a sorority or fraternity. I'm not knocking their decision, because although I never joined a sorority, I completely understood the human need to have a sense of belonging to someone or something. That is the feeling I have struggled with for quite a few years now. Backing up to my childhood, I lived in the same place around the same people for most of my life. We were a close-knit village kinda place. I loved it. Of course I realize that for some people, this would be an absolute nightmare; the past mistake that you can't run from, little sense of mystery or adventure, everyone poking their nose in your business. Well, I loved it, but once I went to college and got married, I saw a big world out there and I was itching to see it. This is what brought us to the Atlanta area. With a giant mess of college loans to pay back and a small Uhaul truck, we came to Atlanta with the hopes of a new sense of belonging.
Flash forward to today. We have been living in Dunmovin for 9 years. In that time, we have seen some changes of neighbors and landscapes. I have watched our babies turn into toddlers and into "big kids." We have become very active in our church and helped out with many school activities. We have hung out with neighbors at the bus stop and in the street, just chatting about the comings and goings. We have slowly developed that sense of belonging that we dreamed about when we came to the ATL metro 12 years ago. I have to say, it was not easy getting here. I had to eat a whole humble pie before achieving my own Mayberry. I have compiled a helpful list below if you are struggling with the same issues of belonging. Please don't be offended. These are items that I personally dealt with and told myself on a regular basis.
1. Get over yourself. Really, you are creating a lot of drama that just isn't there.
2. Stop waiting for someone to initiate contact. Most neighbors value your privacy and assume that you want to get settled in for awhile. If you want to get to know someone right away, invite a neighbor over to your place.
3. There are a lot of religious organizations around here and some are fanatic about selling you Jesus. It's okay to not answer your door. (I always felt guilty...)
4. Hang out in your front yard. There are tons of walkers and runners in our neighborhood. If you are constantly inside or in your privacy-fenced backyard, how on earth can you meet these wonderful people? Heck, just throw on some running shoes and walk around the block with them.
5. Be assertive in getting to know people. Have a party or invite the bus-stop moms over for drinks. This is the South, and there are still some of those bring-over-an-apple-pie-the-day-you-move-in kind of people. But the reality is, a lot of us work full time jobs and deal with kids, commutes, home renovations, elderly parents, school activities, etc. We care about new members of our community, but may not be able to plan a get-together that week/month due to current responsibilities.
Like I said, these are all things that I pulled together from my own experience. And I will eagerly attest, that there are some awesome residents in Dunmovin who have played a part in helping me find that sense of belonging. Please share your experiences!
-Dunmovin neighbor
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